| | I looked someone very dear to me in the eyes today and saw the
machinations of a perverted psyche. I saw trends and seemingly
incongruous behaviors fall into place like pieces of a puzzle. For the
first time, I truly saw and understood the justifications of the damned.
And it scared the shit out of me.
I saw a flippancy that could lead to more criminal activities or worse.
I saw an ego convinced of it's entitlement to exercise itself in
selfishly dangerous activities. I saw a dark and diseased picture of
the world with just enough truth and reality to make it stick. I
realized that I was sitting next to a person who could legitimize
almost anything, and wondered if tomorrow I'd be sitting next to a
murderer, an arsonist, or rapist.
I also saw that I was stupid. How foolish of I to think that it might
ever change, that decades of picking at the same scabs wouldn't crust
over bad habits and replace them with scars.
The fear of death pales in comparison to the all encompassing knowledge
that there is nothing you can do to change someone's future from the
path it was forced down by choices taken long ago. There is nothing
more nauseating than witnessing and understanding the misery of the
damned hidden behind a facade of flippancy and arrogance.
It's inevitable: this person, whom I loved, cared for, and hoped for, would soon be a serious criminal.
If he wasn't already. |
| | Posted 6/9/2007 12:08 AM - 28 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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